The Searcher's Partner: Navigating Pregnancy and Business Acquisition

The Search Fund Journey Begins

Christine Nelson first heard about search funds from her husband Cliff in 2017, when he was finishing his MBA. At the time, she thought it was just an interesting topic he had learned about in school. It wasn't until after they got married in late 2019 that Cliff sat Christine down for a serious conversation about wanting to pursue a search fund.

"I kind of had an 'oh, I didn't realize this was something you actually wanted to do' moment," Christine recalls. "Please let's rewind and try to fill me in on what this would mean for you and for me."

Initially, Christine was skeptical and critical of the concept. "My first response was 'This can't be real, you are making this up,'" she says. "What do you mean someone's just going to sell you their business? Who are you to think you can do this?"

However, Christine was open to the idea of embarking on new adventures with Cliff. "I knew when I married him that I was going to experience a lot of things that I probably wouldn't have if I had just stayed with a nice Midwest mentality," she explains.

Preparing for Major Life Changes

As Cliff began his search in early 2020, Christine started to grasp the reality of what it would mean for their lives. There was the possibility of having to relocate anywhere in the country for the right business opportunity.

"For me it's more about where we're going to live, because that's what my life is going to be," Christine says. "We kind of had a little bit of an adjustment on that."

The COVID-19 pandemic hit just as Cliff was starting his search, which actually gave Christine more insight into the process. Working from home in their one-bedroom Chicago apartment, she could overhear all of Cliff's fundraising and sourcing calls.

"I joke that not too far into his process, I could probably give his spiel - I knew it pretty well, I heard it so many times," Christine says. This allowed her to be a sounding board for Cliff and gain respect for the amount of work involved in a search.

Balancing Search and Family Planning

As the search continued, Cliff and Christine had to make a major decision about starting their family. "We decided you know, we have to start a family," Christine explains. "It was a very big conversation the whole time of do we wait until you finish your search or do we start it now?"

Ultimately, they decided not to put their lives on hold for the search. "Don't let search stop living your life - we want to have a family, let's have a family," Christine recalls thinking. "We'll figure out how to do this."

They discussed the worst case scenario of Christine giving birth right as Cliff closed on a business. "Unfortunately for us, that's exactly what happened," she says.

The Stress of Converging Timelines

As Christine's due date approached in November 2022, the timeline for Cliff closing on a business kept getting pushed back closer and closer.

"Being the one that was pregnant, any of you listeners who have been or have a partner who has been pregnant, you understand that women want to nest," Christine explains. "I felt like I couldn't do a lot of things that naturally my body was telling me to do."

She wanted to set up a nursery and put down roots, but they couldn't commit to buying a house or fully preparing for the baby since they might have to move soon after for the business. Their small apartment became cluttered with baby items as they tried to make do.

"I'm sitting here thinking about the baby and just looking around and thinking this isn't right, none of this is right, this is not what I planned," Christine recalls. "It's out of my control, there's nothing I can do to make it better except just take it every day and know that we're going to be okay."

The uncertainty and lack of control over the situation took an emotional toll. "It became pretty tough. I ended up just internalizing it a lot," Christine says. She found herself deflecting questions from friends and family about their plans, simply saying "The plan is we're going to have a baby. We'll figure everything else out."

A Whirlwind of Major Life Events

Cliff closed on the business, a mental health services provider called Psychogeriatric Services (PGS), on November 4th. Christine was induced on November 8th and gave birth to their son Calvin on November 9th.

"We are both in the hospital exhausted for many different reasons," Christine remembers. "Cliff's jumping on calls because he is three days into this business, and here I am trying to figure out how to nurse and how to sleep and what to do with the baby."

Within days, Cliff had to start traveling back and forth to Maryland where the business was located. Christine relied on family members coming to help as she adjusted to being a new mom.

"I feel like I need to be the sole parent at this point," she says. "I knew that Calvin had to be my focus. I would tap into [Cliff] as much as I can, but know that he's really being pulled in two directions."

The Pressure to Relocate

Just a few weeks after Calvin was born, Cliff told Christine they needed to move to Maryland as soon as possible so he could be present for both the business and the family. This was earlier than their original plan to move after the new year.

"I understood it, I got it," Christine says. "But that was probably the first time I really pushed back and said no, we can't do it."

She wanted more time to recover, bond with the baby, and say proper goodbyes in Chicago. But she also recognized Cliff's struggle trying to manage both responsibilities from afar.

They compromised on moving right after Thanksgiving. However, Christine then developed mastitis and had complications from antibiotics, putting the move in jeopardy again at the last minute. Fortunately, she recovered just in time for them to proceed with the relocation.

An Emotional Transition

"I cry almost the whole way," Christine says of their drive to Maryland. "It is not the exit from Chicago that I expected."

After living in Chicago for nearly 10 years, it was an abrupt and emotional departure. "I feel like we are sneaking out in the dead of the night, just running away," she recalls thinking.

The first few months in Maryland were challenging as Christine adjusted to being in a new city with a newborn while Cliff worked long hours getting up to speed with the business. She experienced some depression and loneliness.

"I got myself a therapist - that was very helpful, I did that pretty quick," Christine says. She also joined mom groups and workout classes to start meeting people.

Reflecting on the Journey

Two years later, Christine has a much more positive perspective on the experience, even though she wouldn't want to repeat it.

"I'm honestly extremely thankful that we did it," she says. "It got us to a really good place. We're very happy where we are."

Beyond their current circumstances, Christine feels the journey changed her for the better. "I'm a different person than I was in 2019 when we started this," she explains. "I'm a lot stronger. I can deal with ambiguity and change and risk a lot more. Those are things that I'm proud of."

She hopes other partners of searchers can have similarly transformative experiences. "If you're the partner and you're finding that this is tricky, I hope that you also end up being proud of the position that you end up in," Christine advises.

"Find the good things about going through it and lean into that entrepreneurial spirit that your partner is going to, because that helped me a lot - just sort of acting like I am [an entrepreneur] myself."

Advice for Searchers and Their Partners

Christine emphasizes the importance of searchers keeping their partners involved and informed throughout the process:

"If you're the searcher, just remember that your partner's on this journey as well. Have a little empathy for what they're going through and try to help them be a part of the process."

She notes that even if a search doesn't involve relocating across the country, it's still a major undertaking that impacts both people in a relationship.

For partners of searchers, Christine recommends trying to embrace the entrepreneurial mindset:

"Lean into that entrepreneurial spirit that your partner is going to, because that helped me a lot - just sort of acting like I am [an entrepreneur] myself. That gets you through those ambiguous states."

She also suggests focusing on the personal growth opportunities that come with the search journey, rather than just potential financial outcomes.

"If [my husband] comes out feeling like 'I learned a lot, these are my new skills, and now I'm excited to go and do X' and he goes and crushes that and is happy and fulfilled - that's what I want in a partner," Christine explains.

The Impact on Careers

For partners with their own career aspirations, the possibility of relocation can be especially daunting. Christine, who works as a food scientist and product developer, was concerned about finding opportunities in a new location.

"That was absolutely one of the top concerns I had along the whole search phase - what will I do, will I have a job out of this, will I have to take some time off, will I have a gap on my resume?" she recalls.

Fortunately, Christine was able to find a great job in her field that aligned with the end of her maternity leave. But she acknowledges that she had been prepared for the possibility of taking time off work if necessary.

"It was a consideration for sure," she says. "That sort of positively lined up with having a brand new baby - okay, well I'll just stay home for a year or whatever and I'll take care of the baby."

Embracing the Entrepreneurial Journey

While the search and acquisition process was filled with challenges, Christine has come to see herself as part of the entrepreneurial journey alongside her husband.

"I don't think that I would be exactly who I am right now if we didn't go through this, if we didn't have all the challenges that we did," she reflects. "If I didn't understand completely what being an entrepreneur really was firsthand, I don't think I would have appreciated it as much."

In fact, the experience has even sparked Christine's own entrepreneurial interests. "I got a little bit of itch myself coming up now, seeing him go through it a bit too," she reveals.

For other partners of searchers embarking on this path, Christine offers encouragement:

"I hope that you also end up being proud of the position that you end up in and find the good things about going through it. Lean into that entrepreneurial spirit that your partner is going to, because that helped me a lot."

While the search fund journey presents unique challenges for couples, Christine's story demonstrates how it can ultimately strengthen relationships and lead to personal growth for both partners. With open communication, mutual support, and a willingness to embrace change, searchers and their partners can successfully navigate this transformative experience together.

Article created from: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ih4B28AB9Gs